One Heathen’s (Very) Personal Manifesto
The fall has always been a time of introspection for me. There is something about the dying of the season, of the fading of the year, the leeching of life by the coming cold, that turns my thoughts inward. Falling leaves, the mist, the cold, swirling wind, and yes, a little Enya, are always good for this. I turn to my altar, and I burn incense in prayer and out of devotion to my gods as countless polytheists have done before me, and I think about who and what I am, and what I want out of this life they have granted me.
Apollo said, “Know Thyself.” I think these are words that would have resonated with my own ancestors. I honestly believe they are words which should resonate with all humans everywhere. For me, the essence of that command is to entertain no false illusions about yourself. Even if you lie to others, never lie to yourself. That is a violation of self. I like to think after all this time (fifty-two years) that I know myself pretty well. That’s not to say I cannot sometimes still surprise myself. That’s inevitable. I don’t think any of us ever reach the point where we have really “seen it all.” There will always be new experiences, unfamiliar situations and problems confronting us throughout our lives. And this is a good thing; it is how we grow.
I try not to pretend to be anything I am not. While the Internet is infested with “instant experts” I do not present myself here as the “ultimate authority” on anything. Time and again I have urged readers not to take my word for it. Some might say, “You have an agenda.” Of course I have an agenda. And I have always been very clear about it. I am no ivory tower intellectual. I am what I am: an educated male who is devoted to his gods and to the customs and traditions of his ancestors. My agenda is to expose polytheism (not just my own, but all sorts) to scrutiny with the understanding that people fear what they do not know. I want to wipe away misunderstanding, I want to combat disinformation and propaganda, and I want to show that the religions of polytheism are not what twenty-plus centuries of Jewish and Christian pious history have made them out to be. Polytheism must not be perceived and understood through monotheistic eyes, but on its own terms, through the eyes of polytheism. We are not what they say we are; we are what we say we are.
My specific agenda here, on this blog, and by extension, with Mos Maiorum Foundation (www.mosmaiorum.org) is to make people stop and think. To challenge their assumptions, to question the “common wisdom” prevailing on the street, learned in church or Sunday school, in public school, in books and newspapers. No source is 100% objective. No source can be. But not everyone strives towards the same level of objectivity and some make no attempt at all (the Bible, FOX news, anyone?). History as it should have been, reality as it should be…these are things I have no time for. I have always striven to be honest, sometimes brutally so. I will offend some people. So be it. None of us can pass through life without offending somebody, no matter how hard we try to accommodate other points of view. Some people will simply not be accommodated, either for ideological (Marxism) or religious (Christian conservatives come to mind) reasons.
I try to conduct myself in such a way that when the day finally comes that I go to the halls of my ancestors, I can hold my head up high. For that reason I try to maintain a certain level of civility, even in the face of attack. But this is my virtual hall and at need I will return what is given. I am no Christian to turn the other cheek and I will not apologize for that. I try not to sink to the level of childish insults and exchanges. If I sometimes fail in those goals, I think I can safely say I am hardly alone, and from the scholarly journals I’ve read, I’m in very good company. But that is no excuse, and believe me when I say I am more aware of these moments than any detractor. If I am proved to be mistaken, I hope that I will always have the courage to admit it. We should not be afraid of “correcting” our beliefs and reshaping our “thought worlds.” It has happened before; it will happen again.
If I sometimes fail to remain within this not-so-neat little box I’ve made for myself, I try always to return to it. I try to maintain an even keel but even a ship’s captain must be willing to engage in risky maneuvers. I have described myself as a militant Heathen, and so I am. Sometimes it is better to challenge. I will sometimes be deliberately provocative, and if it is necessary in my mind to do so I will attack a problem like a pit bull. And I am not a joiner. I never have been. I have no group’s agenda to further. In truth, I am a bit of an iconoclast, perhaps not by choice, but certainly by inclination.
And always I will question with the fearlessness of Socrates, because that is what I think all of us should do. We should never fall so in love with our own cherished assumptions and beliefs that we fail to grow beyond them. I have little time for a person who goes through their entire life without once changing their point of view on one subject or another. That is a closed-off mind. That is a truly lost soul. And those are the minds I especially want to dash cold water against. Think! Ask! Reason! Attack whatever resources you have and figure out an answer and a point of view of your own rather than feeding on the pabulum thrown into the public trough, and never stop doing so.
In the end, it is the love of my gods that drives me. The vindication of untold centuries of devotion to a plurality of gods and to a diversity of belief and practice, the vindication of the wisdom, tolerance and piety of my ancestors. And the one thing I absolutely do not want to hear from my ancestors, when that day finally comes that I stand before them is, “You did not do enough.”
Hrafnkell Haraldsson is the author of A Heathen’s Day, which since 2005 has addressed the life and thoughts of a modern day Heathen. He is also the founder of the Mos Maiorum Foundation (www.mosmaiorum.org) which is dedicated to the study and support of Paganism as ethnic religion and writes for PoliticusUSA (www.politicususa.com) 
"I go now to my fathers, in whose mighty company I shall not now feel ashamed". …
Final words of Theoden King in The Lord of the Rings.
I think you will do well, Hraf.
Thank you, Cameron. There is (I hope) plenty of story left to tell and we have to continue to choose to take right action every day of it, so there a great many opportunities to miss the mark, as it were.
For me, this is much more real and meaningful than some sort of "heaven" and it's a far different feeling to think of my ancestors watching me than worrying about what "Jesus" thought as I stumbled from mistake to mistake in my early years.
I loved the Heathenism of the Rohirrim in the LOTR films, including Theoden King imparting his hamingja to the host before the Battle of the Pelennor Fields and I wish the beautiful Saxon dirge sung by Eowyn had been put on the soundtrack. The portrayal was lovingly done.
I love the Extended box sets of the Lord of the Rings – they SHOW Éowyn singing it – put the scene back in! And it's fascinating because behind her in the crowd of "extras" attending the funeral, there is an older greiving woman whose lips are moving with her as she sings…a lovely detail that Peter Jackson put in, implying that the funeral dirge is one well known to the people. Éowyn is hands down my favorite character of the LoTRs books and movies. Her name means "delightful charger" – the word eoh (or eh) means "war-horse, charger and while wyn means "delight, pleasure", sometimes also interpreted as "horse joy", though thats not supported by Tolkiens language choices. The song she sings is as follows…
Bealocwealm hafað fréone frecan forth onsended
giedd sculon singan gléomenn sorgiende
on Meduselde þæt he ma no wære
his dryhtne dyrest and mæga deorost.
Bealo…
‘An evil death has set forth the noble warrior
A song shall sing sorrowing minstrels
in Meduseld that he is no more,
to his lord dearest and kinsmen most beloved.
'An evil death…´
You know…even when I was embedded in the conservative Christian subculture of my youth, I never worried about what Jesus thought! It was very clear, reading about him – however that you wished to parsed historical accuracy or not – that he did not often judge, that he learned from events surrounding him and reactions to what he said (not all his words were compassionate – but he learned from his mistakes), and that he was compassionate – I never felt fear of what Jesus would think. You know the bumper sticker – Amended for this post: Get along fine with Jesus; it's his followers that scare me to death!
(second half of post- argh!)
Maybe thats why my Christianity survived to remain part of my life…my connection is with my god, not with what people lie about him, my life consists of "right action" and doing, not conforming to Sunday judgemental theology. Yes, my dual path is confusing…but I have no conflict putting out libations for the fey, tipping a horn of mead – yes, I have brewed the stuff, WONDERFUL drink! – for my god (Cernunnos – my ancestry is celtic…although with the Scots back up the family tree, I suspect some Viking is there also…I have long loved the Heathen / Asatru path and literature of the past as well Its why I jumped on your blog when I found it!) and take communion in my Episcopal church on Sunday mornings. It is a ritual, it is action, it is a renewal of sacrifice and by action, it is renewal with connection to god/s.
One of the reasons I got OUT of the Presbyterian church was the passivity and the arrogance and the theology, and no ritual, or cultic acts. The Episcopal church is full of them! I remember one year, after Christmas, we were having our burning of the green, which is where all the decorations for Christmas – wreaths, and pine branches and trees are taken down and burned in a bonfire behind the church…we consider that to be a respectful way that honors their use to dispose of the decorations – rather than throwing them in the garbage like trash. So I was standing next to Father Mike, who was noticing the slow down of traffic across the road at the Baptist church, and the wide eyes looking askance at us, and he laughed and said, "yup, we pagans are making the Baptists nervous again!" Ya gotta love a church like this!
I guess my Christianity survived because I practice it like a pagan. Does that make any kind of warped sense?
As for where we go…heaven, summerlands, Valhalla…who knows but each one of us in our hearts of our own destination. I know that I will be united with what comes next, with my ancestors, and my deities – whether they take the form of Christ or Cernunnos or some form beyond all imagining. Robert Heinlien's book "A Commedy of Errors" posits an afterlife with all the places represented – on character has gone to heaven, one to Valhalla. Interesting theory.
I do know this…years ago when my mother died, I had a dream…only that is not the right term. I had, or was granted, a vision. I found myself in high mountains, the meadows that lie just below the snowline, with cool air and deep blue sky…and over the hill came my mother, whole and hale and well again. We embraced, and spoke…we were aware of her death and that we were parted. We rejoiced to see each other and visited, walking the mountain side. She told me that she would watch over me. And then she went back over the crest of the hill as evening came, and I woke to see her no more, though I had great joy in my heart. There was a solidity to it that I have since come to associate with vision, not dreams.
If that is what lies ahead, then my ancestress watches over me, and I go, indeed to the land of my people and my faith, and shall not be ashamed.
Wes ðu hal.
Hal wes þu.
Sy ðu hal.
Wes gesund.
Hrafnkell, this is a truly inspiring post. Thank you.
Cameron wrote:
". . .my ancestors, and my deities – whether they take the form of Christ or Cernunnos. . .
You might be interested in this post at Walhydra's Porch.
I love the extended box set too, Cameron. I have the theatrical version, which I bought when it first came out, but I upgraded to the extended as soon as it came out. How they could have left out Gandalf's confrontation with the Nazgul in the theatrical version I'll never understand. I was looking for that when I saw it in the theater as I think it's one of the most dramatic scenes in the story.
Cameron, I wanted to separate this comment out from the other because it's so different than the former. All I know is that when I was a Lutheran I always felt like "God"was looking over my shoulder, judging me. I was taught even our thoughts could be judged, since even thoughts could be sins. I was a nervous wreck by the time I was a teenager. I had never felt such freedom when I became a polytheist. And I did not become a less moral person, whatever conservative Christians claim.
Personally, I always liked what Socrates said about death. And I know none of us can prove anything about afterlife destinations, but my ancestors believed the dead speak to us in dreams. My father has done so twice, from wherever he went, and he was a nominal Christian but I'll never know to what extent because it was not something he'd ever talk about. I know when I was going through "hell" with all the Christian sin, he gave me atheists texts to read, opening my eyes to the possibility that the Bible was not what it was cracked up to be. So in a sense, he saved me. And I'll be forever thankful to him for that because I can't say I'd made the break without his encouragement. So I'm personally not inclined to believe in eternal punishments and damnation.
One last tidbit…when I went to my mother's funeral I told my aunt that we (Heathens) believe when we die that we go to the halls of our ancestors. She turned to me and without blinking said, "That's pretty much what we believe." But then as one Heathen told me years ago, "Lutherans are the most Heathen of Christians."
Makarios, thank you.
Heh – I think my Episcopal church would give the Lutherans a run for their money on the pagan influences. Even the womens group calls themselves "The Dissidant Daughters" after the Sue Monk Kidd book of the same name! (I know I mentioned that book – go check it out!)
I admire your Aunt mightily for her response to you at the funeral!
Makarios – indeed thank you for that post url! You have just put your finger on it – I associate Jesus and the Lord of the Dance with each other. I have long given my readings in college years credit for steering me towards paganism, but I can actually go back to a much older influence when I was a small lonely child…Wind in the Willows, of all things, and Chapter 7 – "The Piper At the Gates Of Dawn". That chapter struck me right between the eyes, about as Rat and Mole were struck when they saw The Lord of the Forest watching over the little one that was lost. It was more as if I remember what I had forgotten, but never known…it is interesting that the first edition of Wind in the Willows published in 1908 has the Lord of the Forest on the cover, and not Rat and Mole, or Toad as all other editions do.
Years later, encountering Cernunnos in art and history, in tale and song, I think I felt again what I felt readng Wind in the Willows. And I felt the same encountering Christ irregardless of my church's vicious iconoclasim and rigid dogma.
Seeing Christ represented as the Lord of the Dance – ah yes.
Lord of the Dance
She danced on the water, and the wind was Her horn
The Lady laughed, and everything was born
And when She lit the sun and its' light gave Him birth
The Lord of the Dance first appeared on the Earth
(Chorus): Dance, dance, where ever you may be
I am the Lord of the Dance, you see!
I live in you, and you live in Me
And I lead you all in the Dance, said He!
I danced in the morning when the World was begun
I danced in the Moon and the Stars and the Sun
I was called from the Darkness by the Song of the Earth
I joined in the Song, and She gave Me the Birth!
I dance in the Circle when the flames leap up high
I dance in the Fire, and I never, ever, die
I dance in the waves of the bright summer sea
For I am the Lord of the wave's mystery
I sleep in the kernel, and I dance in the rain
I dance in the wind, and through the waving grain
And when you cut me down, I care nothing for the pain;
In the Spring I'm the Lord of the Dance once again!
I dance at the Sabbat when you dance out the Spell
I dance and sing that everyone be well
And when the dancing's over do not think that I am gone
To live is to Dance! So I dance on, and on!
(Other versions have more lyrics)
Thanks again, indeed…
As for "missing scenes" from The Lord of the Rings – the one that they cut that made me hit the roof was the encouter with Sauruman at the top of his tower, and the dialogue between him and Gandalf, Theodin, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli – right before Wormtongue stabbed him and Legolas shot him. "What is the House of Eorl but a thatched barn where brigand drink in the reek…"
OH MAN! There were all these little scenes throught out afterwards that were just kind of there that depended on that scene and the power of Saurumans voice…and cutting that scene robbed all the related scenes after of any relevance and power.
If you have explored your extras, you realize that when they were editing the Return of the King, at the end and the 11th hour, they were so exhausted that they were making really bad desisions about what to cut and keep…
THats the one cut that nearly gutted the movie. Only their commitment to Tolkiens visions and words saved them, that the intergral story could stand up to that kind of ham fisted editing and still thrive! And thats what happened to the scene with Gandalf and the Nazgul – exhaustion and poor judgemnt from too much on them. At least the extended version put it back in. I never bought the theater editions – I found out the extended versions were coming out, and simply waited. I got to see the first two in the theater in the extended versions too – they ran them here before the 3rd movie opened.
Well, thats done it…heading for the Dvd player….see ya later! LOL!
I feel the need to comment but it's hard to know what to say to such an obviously personal post. A lot of what you have to say rings true with me though. Thanks for this post.
"We are not what they say we are; we are what we say we are."
Really well-said. Addendum : "…with our deeds", and I would add, "deeds the Gods will pass their own judgement upon".
That takes your appropriate reappropriation of definition back into our hands, while grounding it in deeds, as well as the humility of remembering we ourselves sometimes lose perspective — but it is not "they" who define us, but "we" in coordination with our Gods.
I understand, Ulfrun. I didn't really make it with the expectation of generating dialogue, more because I just needed to say it.
Siegfried, a worthy addendum indeed.